Merry Christmas from Rome!
Yesterday I was walking by the newsstand and I saw this delightful ad:
Oh, dear, sweet Antonella Clerici. Host of a ridiculous cooking show, for years, here in Italy. But mostly famous for the fact that once in TV she said “I mean, I can’t live without dick…it’s like, I like it a lot” when she meant to say “I can’t live without soccer.”
You see, folks, “cazzo” somehow ended up sounding ridiculously close to the innocent “calcio” and to this day, she’s never lived it down.
Her ad above says that her lovely holiday apron that she’s modeling, is “ideal for Christmas, but that’s not all…I always wear it when I feel like I want to celebrate!”
God bless her. One time on a call-in to her show, there was this trivia question. She says to the caller, “It foams but it isn’t soap.” And this old, deaf granny on the other end of the line, who clearly is being fed an answer from some mischievious probably teenage grandson in the background, says something extremely close to the Italian slang equivalent used to describe the substance that results from a male orgasm. (Sorry, that’s as diplomatic as I was able to make it). That would be “sborra.” Poor Antonella. She doesn’t get it. Poor deaf granny. She starts shouting to the person in the room with her “What is it? I don’t get it! Say it again!” La Clerici hears “borra, barra… what’s barra? borra? What?” Then she starts going, “Tell me what you mean by that. It’s something you drink. Something that you drink.” Oh God, it’s truly a comedy of errors. Good times were had by all.
So there you have it. Merry Christmas everybody! Get your holiday apron — and get your
borra barra party on!