Rome: Where Campaign Posters Go to Die

13 Feb

Oh God. Really. Don’t get me started. The city is positively OVERRUN with campaign posters. Between those and the coriandoli (confetti) from Carnevale, this city is one big paper wasteland right about now.

Just thought you might want to share my pain. You know you do.

Campaign season is all about formally renouncing any shred of responsibility for anything unwholesome or imperfect, and doing so on a grand public scale, while simultaneously reassuring the public that your solemn face, if voted for, will calmly restore order and ethical behavior to all the land. And this, in a twist of clever irony, is done mostly in a totally “abusivo” way.

Oh yes, folks, we’re into our manifesti abusivi around here. Literally guys who go around with buckets of poster glue and plaster up posters illegally on top of legitimate paid advertising. You know not of what I speak? Oh dear friends, just type in “manifesti abusivi” into Google images. Lookie, lookie! Collapsing under their own weight!

The sheer quantity of illegal campaign posters could easily provide a fairly warm blanket for a homeless person.

Anyhoo, let’s now delve into our collective failures:

Reproach #1: Monti made you poor. It’s all his fault.

2013-01-30 15.59.36

Sponsored by “The Right” a.k.a. Storace. Remember him? He has signs all over the place lately that say “Now Believe Us.” A not-so-thinly veiled reference to this debacle. The phoenix rising from the ashes, no?

Reassurance #1: Aurigemma, Everyday by your side

2013-01-30 16.00.10

Um, no thanks. Really. I’d rather do without.

Hey lookie here, Egregio Sig. Simcek! He’s almost all like “me cojoni” right? Right? Almost, I said. Geez. Don’t break my boxes. And if you do I’ll just be like, stigranca. Said with a totally American accent.

Brain Conundrum #1: Loving Italy Has a Cost, But It’s Worth It

2013-01-31 09.44.25

It’s all philosophical and what-not. But since you’re already poor from Monti, whatever the price is, you can’t afford it anyways.

Here’s my latest favorite though. You have to forgive me because I had to take a picture of it with my crappy ass cell phone camera (kiddos broke my crappy ass digital camera) as the bus was driving away, so just trust me when I say:

Bad Grammar as “Vote-for-Me-Strategy” #1: I AM US

2013-02-11 16.08.11

With a name like Patanè, you know it has to be good. (I have no idea what that means, actually. But if he’s allowed to say “Io Siamo Noi,” I can say whatever I want too.)

And, for the grand grand finale (say it “fih-NALL-leee” like the Americans do, it’s more fun that way), I give you the ultimate, inevitable, inescapable, ineluttabile solution to all, and when I say all I really mean ALL, of your woes:

Backup No-Fail Voting Choice #1, #1bis, #4 comma 6, art. 8A, ecc.: EVERYONE FOR BERLUSCONI

Ha, and you thought I was kidding. Oh, how wrong you are:

2013-02-05 14.48.33

Illegally posted, natch. How appropriate.


16 Responses to “Rome: Where Campaign Posters Go to Die”

  1. Antiqua Tours February 13, 2013 at 11:00 am #

    HAHAHA! If I don’t laugh I will cry

  2. Eleonora February 13, 2013 at 11:57 am #

    I’ll cry. Poor city, Rome IS actually one of the most beautiful city in the world.
    But… It is so covered in garbage that you can’t actually SEE it.
    When they made their voting campaign here (Netherlands) we barely noticed it. All clean and legal. And after the elections, everything was gone.
    Maybe Amsterdam is not so beautiful as Rome (even if I really love it!) but at least I can ENJOY it a lot more!!!
    And what about paper waste, glue all around you etc? (You know I am a bit of a “fricchettona” here)
    And they want to make you think they will restore legality and order?! Such a shame italians still buy that crap!

  3. ggnitaly84 February 13, 2013 at 1:15 pm #

    hahahah this post was the best! brava! I feel the exact same way in Florence, posters are everywhere [mostly defaced by now] along with the crappy confetti covering the streets and people stopping you in the center to give you political flyers. The posters with berlusconi are the best “tutto con berlusconi” are you kidding me? I passed by a campaign room for popolo della liberta and literally there were just two people seated. sorry big B – looks like “tutto con te” non e vero.. make it STOP!

  4. tracie p February 13, 2013 at 4:22 pm #

    the other side of the “tutti con berlusconi” poster says “…a fare ‘na bunga bunga!”

    incredible, just incredible the balls this guy has. UNbelievable.

    (jeremy, my hubs, made a song a couple of years ago about the bunga bunga parties. )

  5. Catherine February 13, 2013 at 5:20 pm #

    Argh it’s driving me nuts up in the north too. We have a tanned blonde campaigning for the rights of hunters and rural life i.e. the right to kill doddering pheasants and fire rifles at 6am by people’s homes; the right to dump more pesticides and leach the land! And bl*** Maroni!! And I’m not even starting on silvio have you heard that idiotic hymn?

  6. Un'americana a Roma February 13, 2013 at 11:14 pm #

    Oh I just love it. See, when I highlight these things it’s not in the spirit of complaining, it’s in the spirit of fun. Honestly, God bless Rome for all the material it provides me. I wouldn’t have it ANY OTHER WAY. I love this city. To each his own.

  7. simcek February 14, 2013 at 12:10 pm #

    Wow! A direct mention in one of your best posts… Mecojoni!

  8. D February 14, 2013 at 7:33 pm #

    Oh but look at the polls. IMO Italians should be forced to wait to vote until they can decide what they want. Voter apathy is huge…. They wanted Silvio out at tutti i costi and set up and sub-par (easily beat down) substitute. Monti perhaps gave credibility to Italy for a short time but he was completely shamed as a politician when Bersani and Silvio kept hitting him from both sides, trying to make him look weak. Berlusconi is really making it close…Sicily is certain. The Campania, Lombardy, Veneto, (and possibly Piemonte) are going to be tight. Silvio has cut Bersani’s lead since last month by half. Toscana is no idicator of this, it will always be left-leaning. Unfortunately they are all clowns and have the same agenda sotto sotto, so let the best in marketing win….and I would not be shocked in the least of the PdL took the senate votes in the end. And if they don’t, Bersani will be a weak premier just biding time until another election. And once again Italians will lament their lot in life but continue to do NOTHING about it going round and round on the ferris wheel of stagnation.

  9. ggnitaly84 February 14, 2013 at 8:03 pm #

    great round up and you are very very right, unfortunately.. :/

  10. Un'americana a Roma February 19, 2013 at 10:25 pm #

    Fabulous. But no photo of you with the baffled me cojoni expression on your face? Vabbè sti cazzi…

  11. Un'americana a Roma February 19, 2013 at 10:27 pm #

    I think I just learned more about Italian politics in this one comment than I have learned in the past 11 years… *head spinning*

  12. Un'americana a Roma February 19, 2013 at 10:30 pm #

    Wait what idiotic hymn? You aren’t talking about the Forza Italia song are you? Oh God bless… of course, back when his party was known as Forza Italia, that is. Oh wait, do you mean “Meno male Silvio c’è”? Oh God wait that one is so ‘truth is stranger than fiction’ you watch it and think “this HAS to be a comic parody” and then you slowly realize, no, no, it’s actually…the man…he really thinks… (then words slowly escape you as you realize he must live in parallel universe where things like this actually seem palatable and credible?) Nearly 2.5 million views

  13. JNoel March 12, 2013 at 11:02 am #

    I have just discovered your site. interesting, true and and witty.

  14. Un'americana a Roma March 13, 2013 at 1:51 pm #

    How kind of you! Grazie!


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