Any excuse to get some early-80s Prince in there.
For some reason I just feel like picking a fight. Not really a fight, necessarily, but just… why not stir up some trouble?
I am itching to discuss some things that normally don’t get enough airtime as far as I’m concerned.
Shall we talk?
1) Cheating on spouses. Does this happen more in Italy, or is it just that I hear about it more and people are more open about it? I know of a number of couples who more or less everyone knows that they have a lil’ sumpin-sumpin on the side, and yet, no one ever speaks about it openly and at the same time it’s accepted. It seems like it’s a practice here in Italy for couples to “stay together for the kiddos” and then pursue their own extra curricular activities on the side. There’s this phenomenon here called “separati dentro casa,” basically “separated but still under the same roof,” in which couples are either informally or even legally separated, and yet they continue to live in the same house but pursue their own separate lives on the side. I’m not judging. But I don’t get it and I guess I’m kind of fascinated by it, because it all seems to be more accepted here in Italy than it would be back where I come from. And I know personally several couples (one or both of the people in the various couples Italian), who are divorced because their ex-spouses cheated on them—blatantly, savagely—leaving photos or other memorabilia lying around to be discovered. Not to say Italians cheat more. But maybe they accept it more? They admit it more? They own up to it more? I don’t know. One of my American friends said to me, “It’s a cultural thing. Italians are more open about cheating.” But are they really?
2) Whatever happened to last summer’s diet fad, that scary FEEDING TUBE DIET? Oh my goooodness people don’t even get me started. Wanna stir up some controversy? Throw weight around as a topic (no pun intended), add in this strange way of losing it, and you’ve got the perfect start. So here in Rome there was this “diet” called the “sondino nasale” which was really big a while back and then suddenly seemed to disappear. Basically you’d see people walking around with feeding tubes coming out of their noses, attached to a little bag that they carry with them, that provides them their liquid diet. One dude I saw even had a Louis Vuitton bag for his “liquid” and no I’m not kidding. I don’t know exactly how it works but I think you do the liquid thing/tube thing for a month. People who swear by it say it’s above-board because you have to go to a DOCTOR to have the procedure done. Well no s(%$# Sherlock! Normally feeding tubes are used for hospital patients who can’t swallow food! For the love! Help me out here.
You think I’m making this up? I am not! At 2:13 the video says “Now the patient can happily start his NEP treatment which will allow him to lose about 10 kilos (22 pounds) in 10 days” Not for the weak-stomached. Literally.
3) We could talk about the old standbys of half-nekkid women on TV or women’s body image in Italian media or how you have to pay people off to get jobs or how every woman on TV and politics has supposedly slept her way to the top… but is that controversial, really? I’m thinking no. Not in the post-Berlusconi era.
4) Why is George Clooney in so many ads around here but none back in the States? Guess that year-round staff up at the villa in Lago di Como doesn’t come cheap.
Imagine, you can.
And while we’re on the topic, poor Elisabetta Canalis. I follow her on Twitter and I really do love her. She was the first I ever knew of veline, back when I moved here in 2001. The other day she posted a picture of herself, by herself, in a skimpy bikini on a pier in Santa Monica after lunch. (Do you think she ate at the Bubba Gump restaurant she’s posing in front of?) Another time she tweeted about how a chocolate bunny she had managed to eat just a bit of was taunting her from the refrigerator but she couldn’t eat it for fear of gaining weight. I remember watching her on Contro Campo and feeling uncomfortable as she burst into tears because she’d regularly get pummelled verbally and treated like an idiot, and the camera would pan up from her legs or down from her cleavage, and how she would try to defend herself while looking like a poor deer caught in the headlights. I just wanted to give that girl a big bear hug, cover her with a huge blanket, and tell her everything was going to be all right in the end–and that even if she was dating soccer player Christian Vieri, a guy known affectionately as “Bobo,” (who in fact ended up fat and on Dancing with the Stars 8), that she’d eventually move on to bigger and better. And now she’ll be forever known as Clooney’s ex. God bless her. Maybe she’ll start designing purses like Monica Lewinsky did.
Hey! Wanna see something really excruciating? Watch this video of Gianni Morandi interviewing Robert De Niro while Canalis translates into English.
Oh hell, let’s just admit it: nothing in Italy is really controversial, after all. There are almost no taboo topics here. You can argue about politics, sex, religion, bribery, and infidelity, all before the appetizer, and once the pizza arrives everyone is toasting and it’s all good times again.
Italy: have I told you, lately, that I love you? Have I told you, there’s no one else, above you? Sing it, Rod!